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NAME

Acme::BooK::Is::My::Bitch - BooK is my Bitch

VERSION

version 0.05

SYNOPSIS

use Acme::BooK::Is::My::Bitch;

my $bitch = Acme::BooK::Is::My::Bitch->new();

my $quote = $bitch->random_quote();

DESCRIPTION

Acme::BooK::Is::My::Bitch has a great story behind it.

At YAPC::EU::2006, in Birmingham, England, BooK auctioned the right for someone to pick a module from CPAN and have that module's name (temporarily) tattoed in his arm for all the conferences BooK would go to during 2007.

Cog asked if the module had to exist by that time, and BooK said "No."

BIG MISTAKE!

INTERFACE

Program Interface

new

Creates a new Acme::BooK::Is::My::Bitch object.

my $bitch = Acme::BooK::Is::My::Bitch->new();

Since all methods are actually class methods, the following line is exactly equivalent to the above one (and shorter!):

my $bitch = 'Acme::BooK::Is::My::Bitch';

available_quotes

Returns the list of available quote methods.

Module Interface

baby_girl

BooK has no imagination for naming his kids.

my $baby_girl_quote = $bitch->baby_girl();

code

BooK is really clever.

my $code_quote = $bitch->code();

favourite_colour

BooK has a favourite colour. A whole palette of it.

my $colour_quote = $bitch->favourite_colour();

meeting_room

BooK had a clever scheme for naming meeting rooms. Nobody ever listened.

my $meeting_room_quote = $bitch->meeting_room();

next_talk

BooK is known to auto-generate the names of his lightning talks.

my $next_talk_quote = $bitch->next_talk();

next_yapc

BooK has something to say about the place the next YAPC::EU is going to be.

my $next_yapc_quote = $bitch->next_yapc();

sql

BooK claims he's not an SQL guru.

my $sql_quote = $bitch->sql();

tell_the_truth

BooK has the pornstars theme on Acme::MetaSyntactic. There must be a reason.

my $tell_the_truth_quote = $bitch->tell_the_truth();

thats_nothing

BooK has the craziest ideas ever for auctions.

my $thats_nothing_quote = $bitch->thats_nothing();

twisted_perl

BooK is known to write very obfuscated code.

my $twisted_perl_quote = $bitch->twisted_perl();

words_of_wisdom

BooK claims he got a lot of wisdom from his grandfather.

my $words_of_wisdom_quote = $bitch->words_of_wisdom();

random_quote

To tell you the truth, no one really knows what BooK is going to say next.

my $random_quote_quote = $bitch->random_quote();

CONFIGURATION AND ENVIRONMENT

Acme-BooK-Is-My-Bitch requires no configuration files or environment variables.

DEPENDENCIES

FUTURE

  • BooK is still growing. This module will evolve as BooK's arms grow.

INCOMPATIBILITIES

None reported.

BUGS AND LIMITATIONS

All reported bugs have been fixed, all requested features have been added.

AUTHOR

José Castro <cog@cpan.org>

MAINTAINER

Philippe Bruhat (BooK) <book@cpan.org>

ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS

BooK actually wrote part of the code for this module and suggested some of the ideas that were turned into methods.

This module is not about Cog mocking BooK; it's rather about Cog and BooK making fun of themselves.

We spent a very funny afternoon in a mini-hackathon in Birmingham starting up this module. We finished its first version while at the Old Joint pub with some more YAPC attendees.

$_ IS MY BITCH

The phrase "... is my bitch" has been thrown around a lot during past YAPC Europe conferences. This tradition has thankfully been lost, but some artifacts remain:

http://perl.ismybit.ch/

The T-shirt that started it all when the first YAPC Europe was organized, back in 2000.

http://schwern.ismybit.ch/

Schwern worked for Belfast.pm, and all he got was this lousy T-shirt. One of those shirts was auctioned at the Amsterdam YAPC in 2001.

http://greg.mccarroll.ismybit.ch/

Dave Cross bought an obfuscation by BooK at the Amsterdam YAPC auction. The code was revelead during the Paris YAPC auction in 2003, and the crowd bid (and won) against Greg to see it run.

http://book.ismybit.ch/

The temporary tatoo alluded to above, at the Vienna YAPC in 2007.

LICENCE AND COPYRIGHT

Copyright (c) 2006, Jose Castro <cog@cpan.org>. All rights reserved.

This module is free software; you can redistribute it and/or modify it under the same terms as Perl itself.

DISCLAIMER OF WARRANTY

BECAUSE THIS SOFTWARE IS LICENSED FREE OF CHARGE, THERE IS NO WARRANTY FOR THE SOFTWARE, TO THE EXTENT PERMITTED BY APPLICABLE LAW. EXCEPT WHEN OTHERWISE STATED IN WRITING THE COPYRIGHT HOLDERS AND/OR OTHER PARTIES PROVIDE THE SOFTWARE "AS IS" WITHOUT WARRANTY OF ANY KIND, EITHER EXPRESSED OR IMPLIED, INCLUDING, BUT NOT LIMITED TO, THE IMPLIED WARRANTIES OF MERCHANTABILITY AND FITNESS FOR A PARTICULAR PURPOSE. THE ENTIRE RISK AS TO THE QUALITY AND PERFORMANCE OF THE SOFTWARE IS WITH YOU. SHOULD THE SOFTWARE PROVE DEFECTIVE, YOU ASSUME THE COST OF ALL NECESSARY SERVICING, REPAIR, OR CORRECTION.

IN NO EVENT UNLESS REQUIRED BY APPLICABLE LAW OR AGREED TO IN WRITING WILL ANY COPYRIGHT HOLDER, OR ANY OTHER PARTY WHO MAY MODIFY AND/OR REDISTRIBUTE THE SOFTWARE AS PERMITTED BY THE ABOVE LICENCE, BE LIABLE TO YOU FOR DAMAGES, INCLUDING ANY GENERAL, SPECIAL, INCIDENTAL, OR CONSEQUENTIAL DAMAGES ARISING OUT OF THE USE OR INABILITY TO USE THE SOFTWARE (INCLUDING BUT NOT LIMITED TO LOSS OF DATA OR DATA BEING RENDERED INACCURATE OR LOSSES SUSTAINED BY YOU OR THIRD PARTIES OR A FAILURE OF THE SOFTWARE TO OPERATE WITH ANY OTHER SOFTWARE), EVEN IF SUCH HOLDER OR OTHER PARTY HAS BEEN ADVISED OF THE POSSIBILITY OF SUCH DAMAGES.